Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:
Sex and Sexuality:
“Me and my bf are fighting about sex.”
Hey Terra,
Me and my boyfriend fight kinda a lot. Today we had a fight and he said "I don't even think you like me." How can I prove to him that I do without having sex or doing something I don't want to do? I really like him a lot and don't want to lose him but I don't want to do anything I don't want to do. Please help fast!Stressed Out
Dear Stressed Out,
You show someone you like him by being there for him, supportive, a good friend, a good listener, enjoying his company. You DON'T prove you like someone by having sex with him. That's just plain stupid and it's also likely to make you lose respect for yourself. (That happens when you ignore your Inner Voice and do what you know is wrong and it makes you feel guilty.)
Don't let your boyfriend bully you. His behavior shows is that he's more interested in his own gratification than your feelings. Not a good sign.
For guys sex is much more likely to be recreational (you know, fun). For girls, there's always the risk of pregnancy, and that makes the girl's decision whether to have sex a much more serious one.
I think you should tell your bf what you just told me, that you "don't want to do anything you don't want to do." You don't need to explain or justify your feelings. It's enough for you to feel that having sex at this time, isn't right. If he can't respect that, then he doesn't really care about you (which is another great reason for NOT having sex with him).
Be true to yourself. Do the right thing.
In friendship,
Terra
Need some advice? Write to Terra.
She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.
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