Questions & Answers

Hey Terra,

And what would be the best way to let my ex know that her best girl friend and I are going out? My ex's best girl friend and I always felt some sort of attraction for each other but I never cheated on my ex. But my attraction for her friend was the main reason why I broke up with her.

Thinker

Dear Thinker,

It really depends on whether you care what your ex thinks and feels about what you do? You two are no longer going out, but are you at all friends or friendly with the same people? Would it be awkward for you to show up places with your new girlfriend and have to deal with your ex being there?

When it comes down to living life with kindness and compassion to others, it's a good idea to think about how your choices will impact other people BEFORE you make a move.

In this case, it sounds like your ex's best girl friend should be the one asking her friend how she'd feel about you and she getting together. They're still best friends so it could definitely create problems or maybe not. But the two best friends owe it to each other to be honest about what's happening.

Are you already going out with the girl? If so has she talked to her friend about it?

If you haven't made your move yet, talk to the girl about how this might make her best friend feel.

By taking your ex's feelings into consideration, you and the other girl are doing the right thing. You may decide that you're going to go out with each other no matter what your ex feels or thinks, and you have a right to do that. I'm suggesting that you might want to weigh your ex's potential reaction into the mix before you decide what to do.

I hope this helps.

In friendship,

Terra

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