Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:
Friends and Enemies:
“My friend is obsessed with the guy that I like.”
Hey Terra,
My best friend is like OBSESSED with this guy and I totally like him. He likes me too but he won't ask me out because he knows me and her are real good friends and doesn't want to ruin that but he wants my best friend off his back! What should I do?Young and Hopeless
Dear Young and Hopeless,
Your friend would do herself a huge favor if she accepted reality -- the guy she's obsessing about just doesn't feel the same way about her as she does about him. She can't force him to like her and if she keeps trying to get him to notice her, etc. she's going to be dealing with a lot of rejection.
Now if you and the guy like each other it's your choice to encourage him to ask you out. You should talk to your best friend first. It seems to me that if the guy doesn't have romantic feelings for her but he might have them for you, then your friend might step out of the way and want you to be happy. But that's a rational approach. If she's obsessed, like you say, she's not thinking clearly. Maybe she believes if she keeps trying she can get the guy to like her. In that case she would probably be upset if you went out with him.
Hey, you two are best friends. Talk about it openly and honestly. Your friendship is more important than the guy. You know how these things are with girls and guys at this stage... The relationships don't last very long any way. Do you want to risk the friendship over a guy who probably won't be around for long?
Talk to her and find out how she feels. Then make your choice.
Good luck!
In friendship,
Terra
Need some advice? Write to Terra.
She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.