Questions & Answers

Hey Terra,

I'm really worried about my friend. She is almost 14 and is having sex almost every day with men as old as 20. She smokes pot all the time, and she also smokes cigarettes and hard drugs such as mushrooms and ecstasy. We used to be best friends, but she moved away and we grew apart. After her younger sister of 7 passed away, she changed. She started having sex when she was 12 and her behavior has gotten worse and worse. I'm really worried about her, and she needs help. Could you please give me advice on what I should do? I'm the only one who is willing to do something about it.

Help!

Worried

Dear Worried,

You are a good friend to care so much about her. She is obviously making lots of unhealthy choices and I'm worried for her health and safety too! You might wonder why she is doing these dangerous things. It may have to do with the sadness she feels about her sister's death, which was a terrible loss! Addicts are hurting and looking for relief from their emotional pain. Often people abuse drugs and alcohol to change what they are feeling. It's likely that she is trying to "forget" the sadness of her loss. Of course, drugs and alcohol and the sex too, will make her "forget"... but only for a short time. When the drugs wear off, the feeling of sadness is still there.

Your friend is in terrible danger and this is too big a problem for you to handle by yourself. I strongly suggest that you have an honest conversation with your parents. Tell them what you know and ask them to help you contact your friend's parents. She needs to be in a drug treatment program. Without that kind of intervention, her future looks very very bleak.

Talk to your parents and let them help you help her!

In friendship,

Terra

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