Questions & Answers

Hey Terra,

Me and my ex went out for a couple of years. Last summer we began constantly arguing, accused one another of different things, and broke up. Suddenly, he called me to tell me that he is with someone else and she is having a baby. How did he love me if as soon as we broke up he jumped into another relationship?

After being depressed for weeks, I finally met a guy that I like a lot. He was very nice at the beginning but then he starts to argue with me constantly and we begin fighting. I really regret getting in this relationship but now there just seems to be no way out. Suddenly, my ex boyfriend calls me and we talk on the phone as friends. He tells me the whole baby situation wasn't true and how he is sorry for the whole ordeal. He constantly tries to steal my heart back but I'm afraid. Should I trust him enough to let him back in my life? Should I stay and deal with my new boyfriend? Or should I let them both go???

What's Next?

Dear What's Next?,

Sounds like you got with the new guy because you were hurting over what happened with your ex. A guy who argues with you "constantly" and "fights" with you isn't someone you need in your life. This isn't going to get any better. You say that there "just seems to be no way out"... And why is that? Are you locked inside this guy's secret prison or something? If you can find the door, then there's a way out. My advice is to use the door sooner rather than later.

As for your ex, his telling you that he was with someone new and that she was having a baby... Well, that's just a mean-spirited, hurtful thing to say. He was trying to upset you on purpose. What does that tell you about his character? And even before that, it sounds like you two weren't exactly bringing out the best in each other.

My advice to you would be to get clear about who YOU are and what your own path is in this life. There's more to it than just being someone's girlfriend.

In friendship,

Terra

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