Questions & Answers

Hey Terra,

Friends for me are such big issues. Summer vacation is in 2 days and many of my 3 closest friends are moving to another state and to two other countries! It is really hard for me. Tomorrow is the last day of school and it may be the last time I will ever see them for the rest of my life.

So Sad

Dear So Sad,

I can totally understand the sadness you're feeling about your friends moving... And to such far away places! :O(

But there's definitely an up-side to this (several, in fact). First of all, if these are really close friends and you are all committed to keeping the bond between you, you can do that with emails, IMs, etc. The Internet is everywhere and if you want to stay in touch you can. Secondly, when you've got friends, who are really friends, then you can set a goal that you will (someday) see each other again. Who knows? They may move back. Or, you may have the opportunity to travel and visit them (and have a wonderful adventure with them in a whole new place).

Instead of focusing on how much you'll miss them, my suggestion is that you shift gears and think about all the fantastic times you had together. Think also about what you learned from your friendship with each of them. You might want to actually give them a "thank you for this friendship" gift of some sort. (A beautiful card with your thoughts and feelings expressed in it would be something each of them would keep forever.) Send them off with a big hug and some tears and know that all of you are about to start a new chapter in your lives. And think also about all the cool things that you'll be able to share with each other about the new things you're all experiencing next school year and beyond.

In friendship,

Terra

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