Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:
Wish I had one:
“How can I tell if this girl likes me?”
Hey Terra,
How can I tell if this girl likes me? She is the HOTTEST girl in my school and I like her. According to all the girls I've asked I'm an 8-10 on looks, results varying. I never talked to her before last week. well maybe a hi and a bye. Now I'm talking to her, and she is nice, funny, and really easy to get along with. She like "flirts" with me. I wanna get to know her a lot better, how should I go about getting to know her? What kinda questions should I ask?Anyhow, I danced with her at a school dance this weekend, and she was like nestling up really close to me, and flirting with me, and running her hand through my hair, and I had her laughing a lot. Also at the dance, she spent most of the time talking to me, even when her date was there, she talked to me instead of him. (She may get annoyed by him a little though, because he likes her, and she don't like him.) Anyhow, and then today, she was laughing, and talking, and she was playing with my hair again. What should I do? How can I tell if she likes me? She has a boy friend, she's not a ho'. Anyhow, what can I do to find out if she likes me, without asking her, and what can I do to become good friends with her like ASAP?
Messed Up Hair
Dear Messed Up Hair,
From everything you've described it's very clear that this girl likes you, so you can stop wondering about that. The thing I'm wondering though is why, if she already has a boyfriend, is she doing all of this heavy flirting with you? Either she's with her boyfriend (in which case she shouldn't be messing around with other guys) or she's a single woman and can do what she pleases. I'm not saying she's not a great girl, I'm just wondering how you would feel if you were her boyfriend and found out that she was "nestling up really close" to some other guy, "flirting with him," spending most of the time at a dance with some other guy, and "running her hand through some other guy's hair"? How would that make you feel if she was your girlfriend? Probably not real secure.
So, since she obviously likes you (and I agree that it's a good idea to get to know her better), how about going beyond the "hi" "hello" and get honest with her? How about if you say something like this to her, "I had a really great time being with you at the dance but I'm kinda confused about something. Are you with _____ or not, cause the way you've been acting with me it seems like you two aren't together. I'd just like to be sure."
Do you think you could say that to her and start whatever relationship you two might have on the right foot (with honesty)?
Your thoughts?
In friendship,
Terra
Need some advice? Write to Terra.
She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.
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