Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:
Abusive relationships:
“My boyfriend wants to fight my ex!”
Hey Terra,
I need help! The reason is because my boyfriend wants to fight my ex-boyfriend! Lately, my ex been feeling on me and yesterday he tried to rape me! I told my boyfriend what's been going on and he's really really mad, I don't know what to do! I told him let me handle him but he said he should protect me and he said fighting is the way my ex can understand to leave me alone! I don't want him to fight and I made him promise me he wouldn't but I think he will. I told the principal what my ex does and they said they are going to handle it but still my ex gives me those looks and it's scary. I can't sleep at night because I have nightmares about what my ex does to me.Help!
Scared
Dear Scared,
I'm very glad you told the principal about what happened. That's a start, but you can't wait until the school "handles it." Attempted rape is a criminal offense. Your parents should know about this too if you haven't already told them. The police should be involved as well. This is a very serious thing and if your ex is still walking around, intimidating you with "those looks" then you need to get your parents and the police involved immediately.
Tell your boyfriend that you appreciate his wanting to protect you, and you love him for it, but you don't want him to fight. That's only going to get him in trouble or hurt, or both! Tell him you'll be prouder of him for being clear headed enough NOT to beat up on someone.
In friendship,
Terra
Need some advice? Write to Terra.
She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.