Hi there… How’s it going? Probably not all that great or you wouldn’t be here looking for help. No worries. Teens have been emailing me since 1997 because I give good advice. If you’ve got a problem with friends, so-called friends, a bf/gf, a parent, or anything else… email me. I can help you sort out your feelings. No matter what’s going on, you always have choices. And choices matter because sometimes the stuff we do to “fix” a problem only makes things worse. You don’t want to go there. Instead, let me help you figure out your next best move
Terra (aka Annie Fox)
“My boyfriend hit me across the face.”
“I just don't feel that we belong together.”
I have a serious problem. I have a boyfriend who is 18 and I've been with him for more than a year. But the thing is he has been insulting me lately and wanting to touch me and I don't like that. I tell him to stop but he doesn't so he keeps saying that I'm a whore and a slut because I won't let him touch me. And he says I'm probably getting touched by other guys in my school and that isn't true.
Today he was screaming at me in the car and when we got home he hit me across the face. I told my mom and my brother but they told me to not worry. I'm already tired of the things he's doing and...
Recently me and my guy have recently entered a "long-distance" relationship and it's been ok so far, but I have no clue why I'm feeling like this all of a sudden. I periodically have these gut feelings that we won't last. It's such a terrible feeling. Why? I've done nothing wrong. He's done nothing wrong. I just don't feel that we belong together. It's not like I'm gonna up and do something crazy, like cheat on him, but I feel so bad because of these feelings. As much as I say to myself that I have to have more faith and believe in the relationship, I feel so naive because these feelings...
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February 7, 2016
I've been experiencing some moral differences with my parents. I've always idolized my them, but recently, I've realized I simply can't agree with some of their ideas.
On a recent trip we took public transportation and most of the people riding with us were African Americans. My mom kept whispering derogatory racist remarks to me and my sister. And just a few days ago, my mom argued that a person's skin color and other aspects of appearance are a direct link to the quality of the person.
I love my parents, but it makes me confused when I disagree so vehemently with people I care about. Racism is a big issue and I hate to see my parents contribute to it.
How should I respond when they bring up or argue this topic again? Is debating with them a viable solution? – Confused
I am very proud of you for recognizing racist remarks when you hear them and knowing it's not ok to talk like that. Even if these remarks come from someone you love and idolize (like your parents) a racist comment is still a racist comment! You're right. Racism is a big issue and you have chosen to be part of the solution, not the problem. I admire you for taking that role.
So how should you respond when parents try to argue their ignorant perspective? Great question! To discover the answer you first need to examine the answer to this question: “When it comes to other people’s attitudes, opinions, feelings, thoughts and behavior what power do I have?” You sound like an extremely intelligent individual so you probably don’t need me to tell you that you have no power over what others think or feel or do. More »